Saturday, January 10, 2026
Summary
In a twist wilder than a rogue toupee, President Trump, after years of burger bravado, admits he might try those 'fat drugs' he mocked, all while launching a colossal discount scheme for them!
Full Story
🧩 Simple Version
Imagine President Trump, a larger-than-life character who really loves his cheeseburgers, suddenly eyeing a tiny little needle. Gasp!
He used to call those needles “fat drugs” and probably snorted Diet Coke through his nose laughing at friends who used them. But now? He's like, “Hmm, maybe I should try one!”
But wait, there's more chaos! He's also rolling out a super-duper discount program to sell these very same 'fat drugs' to everyone else for super cheap. It's like the biggest, loudest fast-food connoisseur suddenly decided to become a bargain diet-pill salesman! HONK! HONK!
🎭 The Giggle Spin
So, President Trump, the human embodiment of a five-star buffet and a tireless advocate for the 'Big Mac diet', is bloop suddenly considering a magic shrinking serum! This is the same man who once declared himself a 'peak physical specimen,' probably while juggling a Diet Coke and a double-decker burger.
He's bravely shed a magnificent 20 pounds since 2020, heroically moving from the 'obese' category to merely 'overweight' – phew, America can finally breathe! But instead of doing the boring treadmill thing (which he despises with the fiery passion of a thousand burnt steaks), he's now eyeing the jab. Squawk!
And get this: he's simultaneously rolling out a massive discount plan for these very 'fat drugs' he once snickered at. It's like a cartoon villain giving away free superhero capes after secretly wanting one for himself. The sheer absurdity of it all is palpable!
“What? Me, Ozempic? Never! (Unless it’s on sale, then maybe. For... uh... a friend!)” - Totally Fictional Trump Quote
✅ Giggle Reality Check
Alright, let's inject a dose of slightly less bonkers facts into this comedic concoction. President Donald J. Trump, currently 79 years old, recently admitted to The New York Times on January 7, 2026, during a wide-ranging two-hour Oval Office chat, that he hadn't yet tried GLP-1 weight-loss medications like Ozempic or Wegovy. However, in a rare moment of self-reflection, he did concede he “probably should.”
This surprising confession came despite his previous dismissals of these blockbuster drugs as 'the fat drugs' among his associates and friends. He'd even told reporters in September 2025 that while